I became a mom this year. This week as my first Mother’s Day approached, I thought a lot about the first time a boy broke my heart. Not the boy, not the moment, but the feeling. And not my feelings – my mom’s. I can’t even imagine how hard it was for her to see her little girl with tears in her eyes asking questions she couldn’t answer. Back then I thought she was just trying to cheer me up. I honestly didn’t think much about it from her point of view. I appreciated it of course. But I didn’t realize that she was hurting too, in fact it’s quite possible that her pain was worse. I know this now because I’m a mother now. And my heart hurts a little everytime my daughter cries. I can’t imagine how much it will hurt the first time someone is mean to her on the playground or the first time a boy breaks her heart.  I would walk through fire to protect her if I could. The world can be a scary place when you are a mom. I was always aware that there are bad people out there (I read the news and I’ve seen my share of Lifetime movies). But now that I’m a mom, the awareness reaches a whole new level. It all makes sense now. Now I understand why my mom was so nervous the first time I got in the car with a teen driver. How scary! I don’t think I will ever be ready for that one.

But I also know something else now, how truly amazing the world is. How a baby is without a doubt, a miracle. There is no other word for it. This little girl, part of me, part of my husband came into our lives just a few short months ago, and we LOVE her beyond any measurable amount. I would do anything for her. She is my happiness. If I have a bad day, her smile takes everything else away. The sound of her giggle reminds me that nothing else really matters in this world. When you become a parent you get to see the world through your child’s eyes.. You get to relive all of those moments and experiences again. As cliche as this will sound- you get to stop and smell the flowers or watch the birds because that what makes her happy. And all I want to do is make her happy. My mom (and dad) sacrificed a lot for us. My mom was a stay at home mom. She didn’t have expensive jewelry and we didn’t take lavish vacations. We ran through the sprinkler in the backyard (until that magical day we got a pool), we gardened, did art projects, we played games around the coffee table (I remember a lot of Memory), we read books (Baby Dear), watched Hayley Mills movies (That Darn Cat, The Parent Trap, Pollyanna and Summer Magic), went antiquing, toured model homes and decorator show-houses, we danced in the kitchen while we loaded the dishwasher and we played hide and go seek. It was fun for me and now I understand how much fun it was for her too!

I now know how truly rewarding it must be to watch your daughter grow up. I know how truly excited she was for me when I was accepted to the college I wanted to attend. I can now fully grasp how hard it must have been when I announced I was moving to Baltimore after college graduation. I know how happy she was for me when she met the man I’d spend the rest of my life with and the little girl that is my every happiness.

My mom has been here four times since my daughter was born. Mom was here when my baby made her entrance into the world. She was here for 10 days when my husband went back to work and she was here the day I went back to work. That was a hard day. My mom knew it would be and her being here, made it a little easier.  She has been amazing. It’s hard to be so far away from her and I am so thankful for our FaceTime chats.

So today mom I want to say:  Thank you for being my constant cheerleader, my shoulder to cry on, and a safe place where I can always share ideas and never feel judged. Thank you for sharing your greatest possession with me, your time! Mom, you have helped shape me into the strong woman I have become and the mother I am today.

Yes it’s true, I have always known that my mother loves me. But it wasn’t until I became a mother myself that I realized how much. Thank you mom for everything. I love you so much. I am blessed to call you mom. My daughter is lucky to have you as a Grammy because you are fun, because you are talented and because through your actions, you taught her mommy how to be the best mom in the world! Happy Mother’s Day! I love you! xoxo

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